he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
