I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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