I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
