I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
