who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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