hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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