but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
