We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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