Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
