does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
