??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
17 year olds will be the death of me.
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I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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