ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
