we're blogging at a bar
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
