are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
