I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
