just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Randomize
