What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
