Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
