what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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