That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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