ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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