Christians are straight up FREAKS
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
