doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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