i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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