Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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