Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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