Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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