just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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