Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I am one with the molecules
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
