1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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