should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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