I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
