It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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