Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
