So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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