does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
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At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
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I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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