going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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