I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize