I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize