Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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