I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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