It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize