just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I think your dad took our porno
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize