Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
