Quick, to the slutcave!
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
