mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
