do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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