We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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