She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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