I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Randomize
