apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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