i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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