sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Randomize
